


Dollface

by TheJoysOfAMultishipper (Amemah)



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Daredevil (TV), Leverage, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The West Wing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Darcy Lewis & Toby Ziegler, Darcy Lewis is Tony Stark's Daughter, F/F, F/M, Gen, Other, Witchcraft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-21
Updated: 2015-11-29
Packaged: 2018-04-27 10:58:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 9,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5045686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amemah/pseuds/TheJoysOfAMultishipper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of prompts from my tumblr, thejoysofamultishipper.tumblr.com!</p><p>Please check tags and warnings for each chapter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sleep; Darcy Lewis x Antoine Triplett; First Kiss

“Whoah, Lewis!” Antoine laughed, giving her a steadying hand as she tried to find her balance in the heels. Darcy giggled, smiling up at him with drunken eyes. She _might_ have had one shot too many.  
“You’re cute,” She said, one hand coming up to poke his jawline. “Very pretty.”

“Okay, time to get the drunk lady home!” Antoine decided, reaching around to grip her waist firmly.

He was the designated driver, but everyone else had already gone home. Thankfully, Darcy and he were the only left, so he wouldn’t have to drop off any other drunken colleagues before getting her safely home. That was the only reason he was happy they were alone. Maybe. Probably not, but whatever.

“And you have very steady hands,” Darcy reached down tangle her fingers with his, and Antoine had to remind herself that she was drunk and cuddly and that was _it_. “Soft, too. That’s always good,”

“Darcy, come on. The car just down here,” Antoine said patiently, ignoring the way his heart thumped faster every time she touched him. He led her down the sidewalk, giving every person who glanced twice at her the stink eye – he had about zero precent tolerance for catcalls.

“Okay,” Darcy sighed, and then yelped as she stumbled on a hole in the ground. He managed to catch her before she fell, but the heel of the shoe was shot to hell.  
“All right, fuck this,” Antoine muttered, before leaning down to lift her up. Darcy looked disoriented for a few seconds, and Antoine braced himself for the vomit. Instead, she burrowed into his neck, her eyelashes fluttering against the sensitive skin there.

“You smell nice,” She mumbled softly.  
“Thanks.”

Drunk girls were the _best_.

\--

“Darcy, wake up,” Antoine shook her lightly in his arms, purposefully ignoring the strain in his muscles. He’d had to walk up four flights of stairs while carrying her, and while she wasn’t heavy, she wasn’t exactly a baby either. Hell, even a baby was tiring to carry after ten minutes. “I need the key.”

“Under th’ mat,” She mumbled, apparently having lost the ability to speak after several shots of Tequila.  
“Can you stand?” He asked, feeling just a tad bit relieved when she nodded sleepily.

He managed to fish out her key – making a mental note to update her security in the near future – and got them inside without any major injuries. Well, Darcy scratched her stocking and then pouted about it, but that was about it.

After she was safely in bed, without any broken shoes or scratched stockings, he went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. He had to walk past her bed to get to her bathroom for painkillers, and she was already fast asleep.

“Darcy,” He whispered, something inside him twisting as she opened her eyes slowly. That he had crush on her wasn’t exactly a secret – though thankfully Darcy didn’t seem to know – but no one knew exactly _how_ bad it was. He’d lost count over how many times he’d thought of waking up beside her, and while this was a poor imitation of it… It did remind of what he didn’t have.

“Wha’?”  
“Take these,” He ordered, handing her one Paracet and one Ibux. “And drink the whole glass. You’ll thank me in the morning.”

She took the water, downing it and the pills easily. Her hands were a bit unsteady, so he took the glass from her, setting it down on her nightstand. Her hand was still shaky as it came to rest on the side of his neck, pulling him towards her.

“Darcy,” He warned, though he didn’t really know what he was warning her _against_. Her eyes were so blue. “You’re drunk.”

She kissed him. It was sweet, no tongue, no teeth, nothing. Just a soft press of warm lips, and then a sigh as she pulled away. It still made him breathless, his skin tingling as her hand fell from his neck.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” She smiled, falling back into the pillows. She was asleep before he could say anything.

Drunk girls were the _worst_.


	2. First Meeting; Darcy Lewis x Spencer Reid;

The first time they meet they’re in a grocery store.

“Do you need some help with that?” A voice asks from behind her, and from the sound of it, the person belonging to said voice is cute. Which means a cute person got the pleasure of watching her jump after the dish washer soap, while she was wearing her ratty sweatpants and a t-shirt that says she’s part of the #AvrilLavigneDefenceSquad. Tony bought it for her. She was not amused. For the record, she still not amused.

“Uh, yes.” Darcy turned around, coming face to face with the single most adorable human in history. “Please.”

“I used to be short as well,” He smiled, leaning over her to grab the bottle easily. “But puberty happened.”

“It most certainly did,” Darcy murmured quietly. She then spent three seconds praying that he didn’t hear that, and that if he did, he’d accept her explanation of running on three hours of sleep and Pop-Tarts.

“Here you go!” He smiled again – had he really stopped? –, handing her the bottle. He didn’t seem to have heard her, but he could just be polite. Best to make a quick exit.

“Thanks,” Darcy grabbed the bottle, looking at the man for a few seconds. He looked back though, so Darcy couldn’t take all the blame for all the social failing that was going on. “Right! Thank you, good bye!”

The awkward shuffle she did as she walked away from him definitely wasn’t her finest moment. He seemed to be amused by her though, which was something.

—

The second time they meet, he saves her life. Darcy was just surprised as he was.

—

The third time they meet, Hotchner is walking out of Natasha’s bedroom. There were a lot of awkward pauses and smug smiling.

—

The fourth time they meet… The less said, the better. Garcia and Tony become best friends though, surprising absolutely _no one_.

—

The fifth time they meet, he proposes to her. Only not really. But also kinda really.


	3. Witchcraft; Darcy Lewis x Johnny Storm

“This is stupid, even for _me_ ,” Darcy whispered to herself, looking helplessly at the bowl of assorted ‘withcy’ things one of her ladies had gotten for her at the market.

“Agreed.”

Darcy screamed, grabbing her sword from its sheath and getting quickly to her feet. The blade of the sword was held against the unknown man’s neck within seconds, and Darcy realized with a heaving breath that she might have to kill this man.

“My Lady, please. Calm down.” He held his hands up in a gesture of surrender, and Darcy would have believed him, hadn’t it been for his cocky smirk and the way his hands were balled into loose fists. Her father hadn’t won the crown by being an idiot, and he’d taught her not to be one either.

“It’s _Your Highness_.” Darcy said coldly, stepping forward and making the man walk with her. She held her dress up with her other hand, inwardly cursing propriety and tradition for making her wear three layers of thick silk. “And no one tells me to calm down.”

“I’m sorry, Your Highness.” He said quickly, eyes diverted in a submissive manner. His blond hair was obscuring his eyes, but she could see them looking up her, playfully, like he knew she couldn’t make herself hurt him. Damn him, but he was right. Still – she did have her sword against his neck. That should count for something. “I did not mean to presume.”

“And yet, you did.” She said; drawing on all the training her mother had instilled in her. She hadn’t been much of a fan of the etiquette classes she and her sisters had been subjected too, but there was something so ironic about holding someone’s life in your hand and still be polite. It was very Britannian.

“I apologize, Your Highness.” He sounded sincere, but Isabella had already proven that counted for nothing.  
“Yes,” Darcy said archly, timing the tilt of her eyebrow perfectly with the _thump_ of his body meeting the wall. “You said.”

He watched her for a good thirty seconds in silence, silently impressed by her strength. The finest metal made her sword, fit for a princess, and parts of it was made of gold. Diamonds and rubies were encrusted along the handle, and it was obvious it was not an easy weight to carry. She made it look effortless.

“Well?” He finally asked. “Are you going to kill me for catching you in the act of witchcraft?”

Darcy’s heart was beating fast, and she prayed he couldn’t see it. She knew that if she were found out… Good things would not come of it. It was bad enough that she were the female heiress to one of the greatest military powers, but a witch? The Pope wouldn’t like that. He’d have her burned. Stoned. Beheaded.

“You’re going to out me for witchcraft? _You_?” She scoffed, “I am the next Queen of England, and I am the daughter of King Edward the third. The Pope adores me, and wants me married to his bastard. The people love me, and wishes me nothing but happiness. And you?” Darcy watched with rapt attention as her blade drew a few drops of red blood from his vein. He kept perfectly still, except for a twitch of his hands. “You are a _commoner_ , caught lurking in the shadows, watching me like a man with ill intentions.”

“An apt description of the events, yes. But I never said I would out you, Your Highness.” He said quietly, but with authority. Like he was seducing her. _Well_ , Darcy thought, _He wouldn’t be the first. And he wont be the last, either_.

“I suppose you didn’t.” Darcy admitted, lowering her blade a fraction of an inch. “What would you do?”

“I would teach you.” He said, and then caught fire.


	4. Cranky; Darcy Lewis x Matt Murdock x Karen Page

When Darcy had gotten the call from Karen about Matt, Pepper had sent her home straight away. She knew better than anyone what it was like to love someone who didn’t think twice before putting themselves in the line of fire – literally.

Which was why she was standing here, twenty minutes later, panting for breath right next to Karen as they watched their boyfriend sleep.

“I don’t know how much longer I can watch him do this to himself.” Karen said, wincing along with Darcy as Matt’s body twitched as he slept.  
“You say that every time,” Darcy said, hand reaching for Karen’s. She huffed a laugh, rolling her eyes at herself.

“I guess,” She mumbled, “It’s just… Christ, does he _have_ to get shot on a Tuesday? He _knows_ I already hates Tuesdays enough.”  
Darcy giggled, leaning over to give Karen a quick and chaste kiss on the lips. “Yes, he does. And I’m sure that when he wakes up, he will make up for it by apologizing, like, thirty times.”

“I’d rather he used his mouth for something else, but okay,” Karen sighed, poking Darcy to shut her up as she barked a laugh.  
“I can do that,” Darcy wiggled her eyebrows, finally succeeding in drawing a laugh from Karen, “I can even deal with Matt being pouty because he didn’t get to watch!”  
“Nah,” Karen went to sit down on the bed next to Matt, careful not to jostle him. “He’d already be bitchy because of the pain meds. I can’t deal with him being horny as well,”

“Fair enough,” Darcy sighed, settling in on Matt’s other side. “But since I don’t get to eat _you_ , you have to make cupcakes. Got it?”

“Agreed.” Matt said sleepily from in-between them. “And I promise not to get shot on a Tuesday, ever again.”  
“Good,” Karen said, leaning in to give him a kiss. As always, Darcy felt herself go gooey at the sight of it. “I really don’t think it’s too much to ask.”

“All right, fine.” Matt mumbled, almost asleep already.

Darcy’s hand carded though Matt’s hair, the hair on her neck standing up when dried blood showed up on them. “I really don’t want to lose him,” She whispered to Karen, who nodded.  
“Yeah.”


	5. Trust; Darcy Lewis x Maria Hill; Mutant Darcy Lewis

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Maria whispered, sounding like she was choking back tears. The sound made Darcy’s heart hurt.  
“I was terrified.” She answered, he hand making an aborted movement towards Maria’s hand, where it was resting on the duvet.

“How do you think I felt, watching as you were bleeding out in front me and –“ Maria drew a short breath, exhaling in raggedly. Darcy wanted nothing more than to curl up in her side, burrowing her face in the crook of her neck. But she couldn’t, because Maria was sitting in their bed, and for the first time, she wasn’t relaxed in it. And it was Darcy’s fault.

“It’s why my parents threw me out.” Darcy said, once it was clear Maria didn’t have anything to add. “The two people in this world who created me, literally as a token of their love, threw me out when they figured out I was different.”

Maria turned her head to look Darcy in the eye, her heart breaking at little at unshed tears shining in them. “I’m not.. This isn’t an excuse. But the thought of –“ Darcy shrugged, pulling the duvet tighter around herself.  
“If I told you, and you didn’t accept it… Maria, I don’t think I could have handled that. At least not in a healthy manner. But somehow, the thought of telling you and you actually _accepting_ me –“

“Would be worse.” Maria realized. “Because that would confirm that a person who has known you for less than two years cares for you more than the people who made you.”  
“I’m sorry.” Darcy said quietly, “I’m really fucking sorry.”

Maria grabbed Darcy’s hand, holding it tightly. “It’s okay. I understand.”  
“You shouldn’t have to,” Darcy huffed, pushing away some stray tears. “I shouldn’t be this messed up. I knew you cared for me, Jesus, sometimes that the only thing I actually _know_ , but it was just so –“ Darcy paused. “I don’t know. I don’t fucking know.” 

“You know what would make me feel better?” Maria asked, making Darcy laugh.  
“Sex?”  
“Well,” Maria considered it, “It wouldn’t be _un_ welcome, but that’s not what I was thinking.”  
“Oh God,” Darcy sighed, recognizing Maria’s tone of voice. “Whose murder are you currently plotting?”

“Murder? Me?”

Maria ignored Darcy’s look of ‘yes, murder _you_ ’. “No, I just want to know the last known address of your parents.”

“Why?” Darcy asked suspiciously. She had the right, okay; Maria was ridiculously protective sometimes.  
“No reason.”

“Yes reason,” Darcy countered. “ _Why_?”  
“Natasha showed me some great ways of inflicting pain on someone without leaving a trace, and I just think tha-“

“Oh my God, _good night_!”  
“Darce, just think about it!”  
“I said, _good night_!”


	6. Angst-Fest; Darcy Lewis x Matt Murdock x Natasha Romanova; Darcy Doesn't Have Time For Self-Sacrificing Tendencies When It Comes to Relationships

Darcy wasn’t stupid. She knew that the world was round, and that 42 equals 16, not 8. She knew all of this, and then some, which meant this shouldn’t have surprised her.

“She’s too good for me.” Natasha said quietly, but not without conviction. She said it like it was a truth, a truth no one could ever disprove.  
“No, she isn’t.” Matt said, and Darcy was temporarily relieved. But then he opened his big mouth, and Darcy was reminded that she had managed to fall for the most martyr-like superheroes in the damn universe, and wasn’t that just peachy? “She’s perfect for you. She’s too good for _me_.”

Darcy could see Nat’s curls bouncing as she shook her head, could practically see the way her lips pursed and her forehead furrowed, like it always did she thought someone was wrong.

“No. You make her laugh, and smile, and you give her piggyback rides after she’s gotten drunk with Jane on really bad Tequila. You’re great for each other,” Nat rested her head on the palm of her hand, hunching over in the sofa. Darcy hated it, hated how the most amazing woman in this world could doubt herself so much. “I’m the one who doesn’t fit in, Matthew. I’ve always been the odd one out.”

Darcy could see Matt turning his head immediately, and then see him wince as his stiches pulled. Claire would probably yell at him about that when she came to check up on him, and Darcy would _definitely_ stand in the background as really short backup.

“No, Nat – come on. You give her back rubs after work, and you should see how pleased Darce is with herself whenever she makes you laugh. You make her pancakes, and always make sure she has everything she needs to make Emergency Cookies.” Huh. Darcy hadn’t really considered that, how she was never short on vanilla essence or baking soda.

“Okay, then!” Darcy finally said, because this little angst-fest needed to break up. She walked around the couch, letting her hand rest on Nat’s tense back for a second or two.

“How long were you standing there?” Matt asked, wearing the expression of a man who desperately wanted to be swallowed up by the world, then spat out, only to be swallowed once more.

“Long enough to know that we have some work to do in the ‘I am a good person who deserves nice things’ aspect of life,” Darcy answered patiently, “But not now. I think we need some Emergency Cookies first,”

Nat smiled weakly, stretching her hand out to grab Darcy’s. “I’m sorry.”  
“For what?” Darcy asked, “Being human? Having doubts? I have them too. I wonder what two superheroes are doing with an intern, and sometimes when I wake up and you two aren’t there, I wonder if you’ve finally had enough of me.”

“Darcy – that would never happen!” Matt protested, getting to his feet for about three seconds, before Natasha pushed him back in the couch with a gentle hand.

“Logically, I know that.” Darcy sighed, sitting down with Nat on the edge of Matt’s couch. “But emotions aren’t logical, so. There.” She shrugged, before leaning to kiss Matt’s forehead. It was warm, like it always was when his body was healing. “Look, I know you two love me, and I know I love you too. Can’t that be enough for now?”

“Okay.” Nat smiled, and as always, Darcy was really proud to have brought it out. “But can we have Emergency Cookies too?”

“Yes,” Darcy turned a stern look on Matt as he moved to get up again. Nat just rolled her eyes, long since used to men who insist on not being hurt when the clearly, _yes she’s talking about Barton_. “ _If_ Matt will actually stay lying down, and _not move_ as his bones piece themselves back together.”

“I didn’t even break anything this time!”


	7. Lola; Darcy Lewis x Phil Coulson; Canon Character Death

Darcy managed to kick open the door to the garage, swearing like she always did because the damn hinges always got stuck. The kitchen sink was blocked, courtesy of Henry and his obsessing with shoving Crayons into every thing it was physically possible to shove things into.

That three-year-old was the love of her life, but she right now, staring at the pile of rubbish previously known as her garage, she couldn’t help but wish there was another pair of hands around to help her out. Damn her for not taking the time to label the boxes efficiently when they were moving.

“Where is that _thingy_?” She muttered, growing increasingly frustrated with herself. She had searched through two boxes of lingerie, four boxes of China, and was on her third box of World War II books, when she noticed it.

 _“It’s not an_ it _, Darce.” Phil sighed for the hundredth time, but he still hadn’t given up. He was ridiculously protective over that car, and to be honest, Darcy only called her an ‘it’ because flustering Phil Coulson was rapidly becoming one of her favorite pastimes._

 _“_ It’s _a car, Phil.” Darcy said, opening the door and getting in. She’d jumped over it the first time she’d been in it, but the strained expression on Phil’s face had given her a guilty conscience._

 _“No._ Her _name is Lola.” He sad it with his Agent-voice, making Darcy roll her eyes.  
_ _“Fine. Now, can you fulfill my childhood fantasy of flying in a car?” She gave him her sweetest smile, even batting her eyelashes._

_“I don’t know. Will you address her suing her correct pronouns?” Phil asked, giving her a shit-eating grin._

_Darcy slapped his arm weakly, unable to hold back her laughter. “Fine. Agent Coulson, may you please take me flying using this fine lady known as Lola?”_

_“All you had to do was ask, Darcy. I don’t get why you had to make such a fuss over it.”_

Darcy sat the box down on the floor, unable to stop looking at the red paint. It wasn’t as shiny as it used to be, covered in a thick layer of dust. Somehow, she managed to get her feet moving, moving around boxes and bicycles and God knows what, before she was standing in front her.

Tears formed in her eyes as she watched the cream lining of the seats, and she had to breathe deeply to keep herself from sobbing. It was still fresh in her mind, three and a half years later 

_“Car sex,” Darcy grinned, “Check.”_

_Phil kissed her temple lazily, like he always did when she was in reach. He looked out the window, making sure no one was sneaking up on them. If they wanted to, now would be a good time; they were in the middle of the desert and… Occupied._

_Darcy picked up on it, obviously. “You’re being paranoid.”  
_ _“A literal God dropped down just a few hundred meters west, three days ago, and you’re telling me I’m being paranoid?”_

_Darcy shrugged, an easy smile on her lips. “Yes.”  
_ _Phil huffed, “Then I have no problem being paranoid.”_

_Darcy laughed, moving around in the blankets covering them, so they were face to face.  
_ _“Fine,” She said, “But please tell me you’re not thinking of mercenaries when we’re doing the do.”_

_Phil gave her an unimpressed look, “_ Doing the do _?”  
_ _“Fricking the frack,” Darcy said, as if that would clarify it. Phil sent her another look, this one equally as unimpressed._

 _“The sex.”  
_ _“Yes, I know what it means, Darcy!” He said, dragging her closer so he could tickle her ribs, “I’m just regretting going to bed with a seventeen-year-old dudebro.”  
_ _“Technically you didn’t go to bed,” Darcy said reasonably, “You went to_ car _.”_

A little laugh bubbled out of her at the memory of the pained sound Phil made when she made that joke. Five years later, and she still thought it was the most hilarious words to come out her mouth.

Slowly, she made her way around the hood of the car, stopping at the door to the passenger seat. It opened with a soft _click_ , Darcy internally fistpumping. She knew she’d lose her courage if she had to search for they key.

The seat felt exactly the same at it did that day, and if she tried hard enough, she could almost see Phil in the driver’s seat, one hand on the wheel and the other on her thigh.

_“I still don’t get why I can’t drive,” Darcy whined, “I’m the one who knows where we’re going!”_

_Phil grinned, grabbing her hand and lifting it so he could kiss it. He always did that when he thought she was being particularly adorable.  
_ _“I’m not letting you near a car, ever again.” He said, “I saw what happened to Fury’s SUV.”_

_“Look,” Darcy protested, “Can’t we go back to when you were happy I was alive, and willing to do anything for me? I liked that.”  
_ _Phil rolled his eyes at her grumbling, unable to keep himself from smiling. It was just such a good day; the sun was out, they were on an empty road in the middle of nowhere with a picnic basket I the back, and his wonderfully, amazing girlfriend was right next to him. It was a_ good _day._

_They stopped a few hours later, parking Lola next to a few benches. Phil spent ten minutes making sure the bench wouldn’t collapse under their weight; Darcy spent ten minutes laughing at him._

_“So why have you brought me here?” He asked, looking around. There were a few houses in the distance; close enough to walk to, but not close enough to be intruding.  
_ _“I think we should by the land,” Darcy said, smiling as she watched Phil choke on his Snapple. He was a sucker for sweet drinks with dangerously high sugar levels. Still, Darcy could understand the surprise; before she'd met him, commitment wasn't really her_ thing _._  


_“Yeah?” He managed to ask in-between coughs, “Why’s that?”  
_ _Darcy shrugged, trying not to smile too wide. “I just think the apartment’s going to be a bit crowded in a few months, that’s all.”_

_“What, why?” He asked, and then Darcy had the pleasure of watching Phil Coulson receive the happiest news of his life. “Seriously?” He whispered, like he couldn’t quite believe it._

_Darcy nodded frantically, a few happy tears making themselves known. “Yeah. Seriously!”_

“Mommy?” A sleepy voice said by the garage door, nothing more than a mop of brown hair showing. “’m sorry ‘bout the sink.”

Darcy laughed, some trace of tears in her voice but not much. “I know, Henry. It’s okay, I promise.”

He looked dubious of that, his little forehead wrinkling in a very famliair manner as she picked him up.  
“Sure?” He asked from where he was perched in her hip.

“I’m sure. And we can probably ask Uncle Clint to come fix it tomorrow, right?”

A smile lit up his face at that; he loved Uncle Clint. “Can he bring Lila?”  
He asked, too busy rubbing his eyes to notice the way Darcy paused for half a second at the name. She’d been named after Lola as way for Clint to honor his handler.

Darcy kissed Henry’s temple, hugging his tiny body tightly. “Yeah. I’m sure he can.”


	8. Stun Gun; Darcy Lewis x Eliot Spencer; First Meeting

“This is ridiculous.” Darcy sighed, looking over all the different stun guns on the shelf. She was still a bit surprised that they sold these at _Walmart_ , but okay. Right wing politicians did get something done apparently.

“Do you need help?” A gruff voice asked from behind, and it took her a few seconds to realize it was talking to her. She turned around, and then saw the most glorious head of hair she’d ever seen. Apart form her own, because hello. Had you seen her?

“Uh, yes?” She said; wincing as she realized it was more of a question than an answer. His expression softened, like he saw that she was just a college girl, trying to do the most she could to prevent an assault of any kind. Darcy would take pity over non-action every day, so she was not complaining.

“Right. What are you looking for?” He asked, back to business again. He had really pretty eyes, though. Like, _really_ pretty. And he was big, but not that tall. He was muscly.

“Something to reassure my grandma.” Darcy answered, dragging herself out of her embarrassing train of thought. “And something that’ll make me feel safer walking across campus after late night study-session.”

He nodded at that, coming stand next to her in front the aisle. He looked her over, almost like he was assessing her. It felt piercing, like he could see everything from her polka dotted tights to the color of her bra. Strangely enough, it didn’t seem creepy. Just… Odd.

“Do you like pink?” He asked, and Darcy coughed a laugh, because really? Adorable.  
“Yes,” She said, “I do.”

He picked a tiny box off the shelf, turning it over to read the backside. He seemed pleased enough, but it was kind of hard to tell. His face seemed to be stuck in a perpetual frown. Darcy didn’t mind; she’d always had a soft for men who looked scary but were teddy bears with a marshmallow center. And since he was helping her out at three in the morning, under terrible fluorescent lights, clearly he was part of that group.

“This’ll do for a relatively low-risk environment. Get a whistle and some pepper spray, never leave your house without it and you should be golden.” He handed her the box, and she looked over the small, pink thing that claimed to take out people weighing up to 200 pounds.

“College campuses aren’t actually that low-risk. There is a lot more sexual assault going on there than we really know,” Darcy said as she read the back. One million volts, seriously? Is that supposed to be much?

“Most of it’s happens at parties, but there are other options if you want.”

He got brownie points for not disputing her, and then some for offering to help even more. Good people could be found in the Home Security aisle at Walmart at three in the morning, apparently.

Darcy looked up from the box, sending him a quick a grin. “No, thank you. Like you said, whistle and pepper spray, and I’ll be golden. I wont go alone if I can help it, anyway.”

“Smart.” His phone beeped from his pocket before he could say more, and Darcy caught a peak of his screen. _Parker_ , it said. He grimaced as he read the massage, mumbling something that sounded like _Damnit, Hardison_ , and then looked at her with an apologetic expression.

“I got to…”  
“Yeah!” Darcy tried to convey ‘I understand’ in a hand gesture, but was pretty sure she failed spectacularly, “Of course. Thanks for your help.”

“Anytime.” He said, and then hesitated for a second. He smiled back at her – somehow, Darcy didn’t think that happened all that often – and then he walked away.

They met again, three years later at the breakfast table of Tony Stark. But that’s another story entirely.


	9. Coed; Darcy Lewis x Spencer Reid; Steve Rogers, Derek Morgan; Steve Rogers is a Little Shit; Wedding

_“So, he’s basically a male Jane?” Steve asked, looking a little bit like he wanted to laugh. “You’re dating a male Jane?”_

_Darcy was going to disagree – really, she was – but then she thought about it and. Fuck.  
_ _“Fuck.” Fuck. “Jesus, am I?”_

_This time, Steve couldn’t hold it in and snorted an unattractive laugh, reminding everyone in the café that while the Captain was pretty much perfect, Steve sure as hell wasn’t._

_“Oh my God, do I have an unresolved crush on Jane that’s presenting itself as a crush on Spencer?” Darcy asked her Danish, not wanting to look at Steve because human contact was a bit too much right now. “I mean, sure, Jane’s pretty, but I’m not in love with her or anything. Sure, I would have banged her – had the opportunity been there – but I don’t want that anymore? Because Spencer?”_

_“Careful Darcy, your bisexual is showing.” Steve was grinning like a little shit when Darcy glared at him.  
_ _“Careful Steve, your tendency to be a fucking prick is showing.”_

_“I’m still surprised the historians never managed to pick up on that,”_

_Darcy jumped as a lanky man with a mop of brown hair slid into the chair next to her, smiling as he said hello to Steve, before kissing her cheek. Darcy was busy figuring out if Steve was being an asshole or if she actually did have crush on a Jane, and therefore stuffed her mouth with Danish so she wouldn’t have to speak._

_“The historians refused to believe Bucky, Peggy and I were in a relationship, and I think that says pretty much everything you need to know about them.” Steve said reasonably. He still couldn’t understand how they could have been that blind to it; the tension between the three of them when he, Bucky and the rest 107 th came back to camp should have been enough for at least three chapters. There were plenty of men there who survived the war who could have testified under oath to it._

_“I mean, we shared a tent for fuck’s sake. Does Peggy really seem like the type of person to share a coed tent with men who’s more likely than not to be a misogynistic asshole?”_

_Steve tutted as Spencer stole Darcy’s teacup to rise it in a ‘hear hear’ sort of motion.  
_ _“She really doesn’t.” He agreed, and then drank the rest of Darcy’s tea. It was nearly cold, which meant she wouldn’t touch it any longer. Steve though they were adorable together, and felt kind of bad for messing with Darcy – but. It was_ so fun.

_It wasn’t as fun an hour later, when Darcy was on her sixth Danish and looking increasingly guilty and nauseous. Spencer was obviously worried about her, but also didn’t want to say anything because he was terrified she would think he was profiling her. Really, they were a mess. An adorable mess - but still a mess._

_“Darcy, you’re not in love with Jane.” Steve had to say as she got up to go buy her seventh pastry. Steve turned to Spencer, whose mind was obviously running at a hundred and fifty percent, trying to figure out what was going on. “Spencer, you agree, right?”_

_“Yes.” Spencer drew a breath, but Steve wasn’t in the mood for another five hundred word rant – the three he got fro Tony were enough, thank you very much – and turned to Darcy before he had time to say a single word._

_“See? You’re in love with Spence and he’s in love with you and everything is good._

_Darcy stared him down – literally, she as standing up -, breathing deeply. Steve couldn’t tell if it was to calm herself down or to avoid throwing up. Six Danishes are a few too many._

_“In the future, I’m just gong to assume you’re being an asshole.”  
_ _“Smart,” Spencer said quickly.  
_ _“Who, me? The all-American hero? An asshole?”  
_ _“Yes.” Darcy said, “Now, come hold my hair back as I throw up, because Spence isn’t ready for that level of intimacy yet.”_

_“No, I’m fine with it. You’re the one isn’t ready yet, actually.”_

_Darcy sent Spencer a scorching look, as Steve got up from his chair, making good use of her perfected ‘you’re a genius, but you’re being an idiot’ -look. Truly, her days as a lab-manager for Jane had prepared for a lot more things in life than college ever did._

_“All right Darce, don’t say something you’ll regret now.” Personally, Darcy felt that Steve had no right to be called a Diplomat, but she already knew that the world was an unfair place._

_Steve had to constrain himself from laughing as she huffed dramatically, but she did walk away without saying a word. Now, if only Spence could have followed her example._

_“Don’t keep too long, sweetheart, I need Steve to help me get back at Morgan for all that running!”_

Steve pushed away a tear rolling down his cheek as he winked at a blushing and angry Darcy.

“And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how I knew that the bride and groom were in love.”  
The bridal party cheered and clapped as Steve sat down in his chair next to Jane, who was also looking a little red in her cheeks. She wasn’t drinking -courtesy of her gigantic belly and the baby inside it – so she must have been blushing as well.

“Wait!” Morgan said, rising from his chair, Garcia laughing beside him. “Are you trying to tell me that _you’re_ the reason I had to apologize to Rozzi for drinking all his wine, even though _I didn’t_?”

“To Darcy and Spence!” Steve shouted, holding up his glass, avoiding Morgan with all the grace of a master tactician trained by Director Carter. Bucky seemed unimpressed.


	10. Forever Intern (The West Wing Crossover)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forever Intern  
> Darcy Lewis & Toby Ziegler  
> Crossover

“… Also, Joey Lucas had her child – a healthy baby boy, in case you were wondering -, and you sent her a present.”

“I did?”

“Yes, you did.” Donna answered with the usual longsuffering sigh that wasn’t actually as longsuffering as she’d like it to be.

“What did I send her?” Josh asked, brows furrowing in confusion. Somehow, Donna managed to confuse him more than the deficit did. Truly, it was astounding.

“A Baby Björn thingy. Light blue, plus a pair of handmade woolen socks.”  
“Did you knit socks for Joey Lucas’ baby?”

Donna looked up from the schedule in her hands, raising an unimpressed brow in the general direction of Joshua Lyman. “Yes. Somehow, in my hectic and unforgiving work, I managed to find time to _knit a pair of socks_.”

“I’m gonna go out on a limb here, and assume you’re being sarcastic.”

“Is this how it goes every morning?” Toby asked from where he was sitting on the couch, making both Josh and Donna jump at the sound. He was tempted to chuckle at their surprise, but he had a reputation to uphold. “Because I’m beginning to understand how you manage to be late to the morning briefing of the President of the United States every day.”

“I try to be effective,” Donna protested, “But he keeps interrupting with useless questions.”  
“I am Deputy Chief of Staff of the White House, ergo _nothing_ I say is useless.”

“One of you is lying,” CJ said from her place in the doorway. How she managed to be so quiet was honestly a mystery, “And it’s not Donna.”

“And side note,” Toby interrupted, “Don’t corrupt the Latin language by forcing me to listen you absolutely butcher it.”

“I never lie.” Donna ignored Toby, preferring to give Josh a haughty look instead, “Not like this one.”  
“Oh, come on! I’m sorry I lied about the stupid pigeon!” Josh protested, before turning to Toby. “And my Latin is _fine_ , thank you very much.”

“I can’t believe I was ever intimidated by you.” Darcy said, and for the record, those words did _not_ have permission to be spoken.

Josh turned around with the grace of someone surviving on coffee and donuts to look at the unknown girl standing in the doorway next to CJ. She was young. Very young. She had no business being in this part of the building, unless she was actually the unknown child of Leo McGarry.

“Yes, I’m Chief of Staff McGarry’s secret love child.” She deadpanned, managing to look even more unimpressed than Donna Moss when she hasn’t had any coffee yet. Toby instantly liked her.

“And who are you, if you’re not Leo’s?” CJ asked, looking down at the girl. Not in a condescending manner – she literally looked down at her. The girl was short.

“Darcy Lewis.” She answered, “The intern sent to annoy you into healthy eating habits. Also, I’m hoping for a few college credits and a chance to meet Amy Gardner.”

“She can work with me.” Toby rose from his couch, coming to stand next to CJ. “I think my ex-wife will like you, which means she will hate me _less_ , and that’s something we should all work towards.”

“Great?” Darcy said uncertainly, her voice going into scale of ‘pitchy’ she’d never heard before. She also gave him two thumbs up, just to be sure.  
“Don’t do that.” Toby said.  
“Gotcha.”  
“Don’t do that either.”

 


	11. Birthday; Darcy x Nick Fury x Maria Hill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Birthday  
> Darcy Lewis/Nick Fury/Maria Hill  
> Healthy Relationships are Healthy

”Sir,” Maria Hill stepped into the room, instantly drawing the attention of everyone. She was smirking on the inside, as she always was when someone proved how easily they could be controlled.

“Yes?” Fury asked, his chin resting on intertwined fingers. He looked menacing; that perfect blend of intelligence and brute force. Maria _loved_ him.

“Come with me,” She answered, not bothering with niceties. It would do the people in this room good to remember that she _was_ the Deputy and she _did_ have power. “The operation is about to launch.”

Fury rose gracefully, the chair not making a single noise as it rolled across the floor. “Of course.”

“Excuse me, Director Fury?”  
Fury and Hill both turned passive looks on the woman who had opened her mouth, both of them resisting the urge to roll their eyes as she shrunk sightly under their stare.

“Yes?” He answered, voice so even he sounded more alive than Ben Carson. “How can I help you, Madame Secretary?”

“You didn’t answer my question,” She answered, sounding like every overly patient white, suburban mom at a school function where the brownies Mrs. Hansen had provided were burnt, and she was trying ‘ _help_ ’. “When can we expect the report?”

“Madame Secretary,” Fury answered, eyes narrowing to splits as he stared her down. “Everyone in this room knows that _no one_ in this room will actually read that report. You couldn’t give less of a shit about institutional and systematic racism even if you tried – especially not when it comes to the all-American police force.

“Whether that’s because you’re all cowards, afraid of taking a stand, or because you’re actually racists _yourselves_ – well, that’s another conversation entirely. Either way, I don’t have time for this. I actually have lives to save, and you have _dead_ lives to ignore.”

Fury turned on his heel again, stepping out of the door and into the hallway before the Secretary had time to form a coherent sentence. Hill followed shortly, but not before she’d stared everyone down, and discreetly showed off the knife holstered on her thigh.

“You do remember there’s not actually an OP, right?” She murmured to Fury as they walked swiftly down the hall. No one was watching them, so she didn’t bother to conceal her mouth to avoid lip readers.  
“Yes,” Fury answered, allowing himself to send her a quick smile, “But racism is very much alive. And that was the quickest to get out of there,”  
“I’m not arguing – on either point,” Hill said, quickly smiling back as he held the door open for her. “But you do know you’re completely wrapped around her finger, right? I mean, pissing off a Governor is one thing, it’s not like they can actually _do_ something – but the Secretary? You’re on your own there,”

“You act as if you didn’t steal a QuinJet to get to the hospital when she’d sprained her wrist,” Fury pointed out, chuckling as Maria’s face went blank.  
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She said, stopping to wait in front of the elevator. Rumlow was stood next to her, seemingly lost in his music, and he’d already pressed the down button.  
“Sure you haven’t,” Fury said, sounding every bit the sarcastic fucker he always was. “Did you get her a present?”

Maria nodded, stepping into the elevator as the door opened. “I managed to find an 18th Century edition of Machiavelli’s _The Prince_ ,” She said smugly.

“Nice,” Fury brought an arm around her, kissing her temple. Rumlow already knew about them, having earned the right to know pretty quickly. He’d always respected Maria, and knowing she was in a relationship with Fury hadn’t changed that. He still didn’t know about Darcy, but it was only a matter of time. “She’ll love it,”

“I know,” Maria stepped out of the elevator, into the humongous garage filled to the brim with cars of all shapes and sizes. Rumlow went towards his Chevy, Maria and Nick heading towards their Honda. “What’d you get?”

“A necklace that belonged to Giulia Farnese,” Fury got in the car, some sort of alpha male pride blooming in his chest when Maria’s face lit up in a smile.

“She’ll love it,” She said, getting into the car. “What does it look like?”  
“It’s a seahorse,” He answered, turning the ignition. “She wore it on an official portrait, you know the one with the unicorn?”

“Yeah,” Maria reached up to turn Nick’s face towards hers, effectively stopping him from backing out of the parking space. “She’ll really love it,”

She leaned over to give him a quick kiss, smiling as she did. It was a bit awkward, as it always was in cars, but still nice. Still _lovely_. “She won’t love it if we’re late, though,”

“True,” Nick agreed, quickly getting them out of the garage as Maria checked her phone for messages. There was one, which Maria read aloud as they drove onto the highway.

‘ **You pissed off the secretary on my birthday? Seriously? You know I need to beat her into submission tomorrow and that’ll take me three hours if she’s already pissed!** ’

“Maybe we should get her a few cupcakes as well,” Nick suggested.

“Couldn’t hurt,” Maria agreed.

They decided to ignore that _Wrapped Around Your Finger_ by 5 Seconds of Summer started playing on the radio. They did, however, make a mental note to upgrade Loke’s security.


	12. Nicky; Darcy & Tony Stark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nicky  
> Darcy Lewis & Tony Stark  
> Halloween; Darcy Lewis is Tony Stark’s Daughter

“Jarvis.” Tony managed to say, “Jarvis, what exactly am I watching?”

“Based on the position of your body and your current heart rate, I would assume you are watching Little Madame dressed as Director Fury.” Jarvis said, and Tony couldn’t help but think that if he had a face, Jarvis would look just as smug as Darcy was.

She quickly schooled her expression into that of Insecure Child **©** , though, because Aunty Peggy is a _menace_ and Darcy really liked being able to manipulate people into doing what she wants. Tony didn’t know whether to impressed or terrified, so he settled on proud instead. That seemed safe enough. _Right_?

“Do you like it, Papa?” Darcy asked, voice pitched to an octave Tony had dubbed ‘Fake tears are about to ensue, and even though I _know_ they’re fake, they’ll still make me feel guilty, so say something!’. Tony’s brain was a very complicated space, and having a daughter at the age of eighteen hadn’t exactly _helped_.

“Sure, honey,” Tony answered, bending down on one knee as he held eye contact. He _may_ have read every single parenting book, because he was literally _terrified_ screwing this up. “You’re much cuter than Nicky, though.”

Most of Darcy’s face was covered in an eye patch – which seemed to be reinforced, which meant _Nicky_ was in on this -, but it still scrunched up for a second, before a laugh bubbled up. Tony kinda wanted to kiss her little face until she was screeching for Aunty Peggy to come save her. So he did – infuriating costume or not


	13. OPERATION: WEDDING; Darcy x Nick Fury

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OPERATION: WEDDING  
> Darcy Lewis/Nick Fury  
> SHIELD Agents are Nerds Who Overcomplicate Everything

“Hey, what do you think about homemade pizza for dinner?”  
“Deep dish with garlic meatballs?”

Nassir paused in his readings of Coulson’s latest mission, looking up. Because he was pretty sure that was _Director Fury_ talking.

“Of course,” A female voice answered, and as Nassir discreetly looked up – carefully utilizing all of his training -, he nearly lost his tablet. Because not only was the director talking about homemade pizza, his conversational partner was Dr. Foster’s lab assistant. And she sounded _fond_. Nassir was pretty sure it wasn’t possible to direct that emotion in Fury’s direction, sure it would bounce back courtesy of the shield protecting him from anything known as _human emotion_. Apparently not.

“Then count me in,” Fury smiled, his hand reaching out to grasp the lab assistant’s for a brief second.  Nassir nearly had a heart attack, even though Cho had declared him fist as a fiddle. “You know I can never say no to your cooking, Darce.”

Nassir knew that if Agent Morse could see him now, she’d hit him with her baton for letting his face portray this much, but Fury just _used a nickname and it wasn’t an insult_.

“I know,” ‘Darce’ smirked, “But don’t think you won’t be helping me. I am not making the dough.”  
“I know,” Fury said, “Your weak arms can’t handle the strain.”

“Is he _teasing_ her?” Nassir mumbled to himself, because he most definitely _was_. He also figured it was best to leave the hallway before he could see anything else. Besides, Barton would yell at him if he didn’t use some of vacation days soon, and a half day sounded really good right about now.

He could hear the girl yelling indignantly about something as he left, but he was too freaked out to hear exactly what. It might have had something to do with her hands and last night.

\--- 

“That’s Director Fury,” Saga whispered, “He’s the one in charge. He knows everything; so don’t even _try_ to outsmart him. Or leak secret documents to the Guardian,”

Juan turned around as he walked, watching the way his coat flared. It was almost hypnotizing.  
“Everything?” He asked, “Even who will win the next election?”

Saga smirked, “Sanders.”  
“Is SHIELD _rigging_ elections?” Juan shrieked, because there was a line he was _not_ willing to cross. Saga rolled her eyes at him.

“No,” She said, her Swedish accent more prominent - it seemed to grow thicker the more annoyed she got. “Of course not. All the polls point towards it,”  
"Oh." Juan smiled sheepishly.   
“No, I get it,” She grinned, “You should’ve seen my face when I learned that we’re hiding Snowden.”

Juan’s eyes grew to the size of saucers, “Snowden? We’re hiding a traitor?”  
“Fury isn’t a big fan the NSA.” Saga scoffed, “Neither am I, to be honest. They’ve all got a few too many sticks up their asses.”

“Sure,” Juan felt a little bit faint. He had a right to; he’d been part of the inter-agency taskforce who were responsible for getting Snowden back. So was Saga _supposed_ to be. Clearly, she was a great actress. “But no one else, right? That’s everyone?”

“No, not really,” Saga lead him through the door, as he hadn’t gotten his keycard yet. “Fury is skulking around looking like the cat who got the canary. Everyone thinks he’s up to something big; we keep hearing him discuss his ‘wedding’ with Agent Coulson and Deputy Hill.” Saga raised her eyebrows at him, and Juan was smart enough to realize that Fury _definitely_ wasn’t getting married. Apparently.

“So it has to be important, right?” He said; trying to sound like he knew what he was talking about. “I mean, if the code word is _wedding_.”  
“Not even just ‘wedding,” Saga stopped walking, leaning in closer, “It’s _his_ wedding. On top of that, the only other person mentioned is a ‘Darcy Lewis’, and there’s only one Darcy Lewis in Shield. She’s a lab assistant, and twenty-three years old. At the _most_.”

“And there’s no possible way that he could actually be marrying a young lab assistant?”

Saga looked like she was regretting recruiting him. “No.”

“Okay, then,” Juan said, ““It has to be some sort of deep cover operation. That’s the only explanation.”  
“See, you’ll fit right in here.” Saga smiled. “So, you ready for hand-to-hand training?”

“Sure,” Juan hadn’t gotten completely used to the Agents and their knack for changing topics faster than a baby’s diaper, but he was getting there. “Any tips?”

Don’t underestimate May.”

\--- 

“Operation WEDDING is over,”

Alika slid into the chair opposite Anahita, either not noticing or not caring about how he caused her water to spill. She decided to ignore it, as she was really interested in hearing about Fury’s super secret mission, and Barton had taught her to pick her battles.

“Does anyone have any idea what WEDDING was actually _about_?” She asked, because she was pretty sure no one did. Except Darcy, the really nice and really smart assistant to Dr. Foster – and it’s not like that actually cleared anything up.

“No, I don’t think so,” Alika answered as he swallowed a piece of chicken. “I’m fairly certain it’s a good mission, because the higher ups have been giggling for three months straight.”

Anahita raised her brows, her mind going blank as she tried to picture Hill _giggling_. “Seriously?”  
“Yeah,” Alika nodded enthusiastically, and it as only the grace of God that kept him from spilling salad everywhere. Sucker would’ve deserved it; Anahita spent four minutes waiting for her water to get cold enough.

“Okay, ignoring that…” Anahita leaned over the table, breaking just about every rule in not-so-nonexistent spy book. You don’t _ever_ indicate that secret things are going on, especially not if you’re actually surrounded by other spies. “How do you know it’s finished?”

“Because the same higher ups who were giggling…” Alika leaned even closer, his voice dropping to a dramatic whisper. “Were _tearing up_ when Fury came into the office this morning, and _congratulating him_.”

Anahita gaped. There was no other word for it. She well and truly _gaped_. And then made a sound that did not resemble a word at all.

“Mhm,” Alika grinned, “Told you.”  
“Uh…” Anahita then switched from unintelligible sound to another, sounding a bit like a choking walrus. And then said something she _never_ thought she’d say.

“I think we might need to consider the possibility of Fury and Darcy _actually_ marrying.”

Alika laughed so hard he opened three of his stitches. Cho was not pleased.

\--- 

“I heard Romanoff was the ring bearer.” Matanzima whispered into his com, grinning widely when he heard Daria cough to cover up her laugh.  
“Shut up!” She hissed, “I’m in front of sixty cameras and trying really hard not to be noticed.”

Matanzima chuckled, checking that his gun was loaded and in place before opening the door in front of him. “I offered to be the security detail,” He reminded her, grinning again when heard her huff. It was always fun to be paired with Daria, especially when she was annoyed.

“No,” She said, “I’m much better at keeping calm in the face of misogyny.”  
“Mhm,” Matanzima hummed, making sure Daria knew how little he believed her. “I’m sure the way you flash senators various guns are completely accidental.”

“Of course,” Daria answered sweetly, and in the background he could hear her short heels clicking on asphalt as she walked towards the car. “I’m a professional.”  
“Was that a dig at me for punching that Governor?” Matanzima asked; controlling his breathing as he made sure the man he incapacitated didn’t get up again. “Because he had that coming.”

“I love how you managed to keep yourself in check when he was staring at my tits, but _not_ when he said global warming isn’t a threat.”  
“They’re _destroying our planet, Daria_!”

She laughed, walking around the black SUV to get into the driver seat. “Copy that,” She answered, pretending to be talking about stuff related to her ‘job’. She may not be a complete professional all the time, but she did know how to fake it in front of her ‘employers’.

And since faking it meant shutting up when she was in the vicinity of Senator Halliwell; that meant Matanzima had time to tell her about Fury’s ‘wedding’.  
“So, Romanoff was the ring bearer. To be honest, I can definitely see that happening. If I were getting married, I’d leave the important details to her as well. Now, some say -”

Daria held her breath as she heard a gunshot ring through her com, but Matanzima was talking again soon enough. “Some say Coulson was the Best Man, but other swear it was Hill. Personally, I think Hill officiated it and Coulson was the Best Man.”

Daria wondered if Matanzima actually believed what he was saying, and how long it would take him to secure the location they were driving towards because it was 250 degrees inside the car and she was in a pantsuit that was doing her no favors.

“Agent Buckingham swears that Darcy’s engagement ring is the same as the Duchess of Cambridge’s. And by the same, I mean _exactly_ the same.”  
“There is no way he’d risk an international incident like that.”

Senator Halliwell looked up from his tablet at her outburst, but seemed content to ignore her.

“Believe what you will,” Matanzima said, disarming three women and making sure he wasn’t getting stabbed, “I’m just telling you the rumors. There’s also some who say that Loki was the one to walk her down the aisle, and I really wonder just _what_ they are smoking.”

Daria didn’t have time to remind Matanzima that they were discussing Fury’s wedding and that _anything_ was possible, because six men with machine guns ran out in the road and placed themselves in front of her car.

“For fuck’s sake.” She muttered; turning around to look at he terrified Senator. “You better be worth getting shot for.”

\--- 

“Darcy Lewis-Fury is pregnant.”  
Nassir came to stand next to Matanzima, holstering his Glock.

“Are we still the only ones who actually believes they’re married?”  
“Yep,” Nassir grinned. “I can’t _wait_ to see Saga’s face.”

“Don’t get too excited,” Matanzima warned, “Fury already has it hard enough keeping the security protocols when t comes to Darcy to a minimum. Imagine how he’ll be with their _kids_.” 

Nassir _was_  going to consider that, but just then a very familiar figure stepped out from the shadows, and they remembered exactly _why_  he was was the boss to end all bosses. 

“Exactly,” Fury said, “So... You interested in becoming Level 8?”

“You’re so fucking dramatic,” A new voice said from behind Matanzima. He turned around, looking at the short woman standing with her hand over her belly. There was a _tiny_  bump there, barely noticeable. 

“Director of SHIELD, honey,” Fury said, rolling his eye. Nassir had a sense of Deja Vu as he watched Matanzima’s reaction to the couple, completely sure he looked exactly the same that day in the hallways. “It’s kind of required.”

“Whatever you say, sweetheart.”

“Oh, I can’t wait to tell Daria,” Matanzima whispered, looking like a 6 foot tall child as he grinned. 


End file.
